Etiquette for Wedding Guests

Now that wedding season is here with us, here a few etiquette tips to consider ....

1.     RSVP

RSVP is an abbreviation for Respondez S’il Vous Plait (Please respond). The essence of RSVP is to help the couple to keep track of the number of guests to expect on their wedding day.

Having a good estimate of guest numbers is helpful in planning for the set-up as well as food and drinks. However, in Ghana, it appears that we only call the RSVP contact when we need directions to the venue.

So couples usually have to estimate how many people will show up at their wedding. When they underestimate the number of people attending, some guests are left standing and the food runs out before everyone is served L When they overestimate, there are empty tables, and food goes to waste L

So next time you receive a wedding invitation, do well to RSVP.

Photo credit: http://www.zazzle.com/cartoon+style+wedding+invitations

2.     Dress For The Occasion

Make an effort to dress to suit the occasion. Remember that a wedding is a solemn ceremony, so modesty should guide your outfit of choice.

If the ceremony is at a place of worship (church, mosque, etc), ensure that your outfit complies with the dress code and religious beliefs of that place of worship. When in doubt, ask the couple.

It is also important to consider the venue of the ceremony/reception when choosing your outfit. So while a sundress or a shirt and trousers will be perfect for a garden wedding and reception, an evening gown or tuxedo will be ideal for a reception dinner in a ballroom of a five star hotel.

Photo credit: http://www.123rf.com/clipart-vector/office_dress.html

3.     Be On Time

Gone are the days when brides were blamed for lateness. These days, a bride who arrives to the ceremony on time, is likely to walk down the aisle in a half-empty church.

On my wedding day, as I walked down the aisle, I was surprised to see that the church was almost empty. “Where is everyone?” I wondered. Thankfully, by the time the ceremony was over, the room was almost full to capacity.

The worst offenders are those who skip the ceremony altogether and show up at the reception.

Photo credit: http://www.cool-cuffs.co.uk/products/dont-be-late-wedding-cufflinks-with-personalised-time

4.     Be Present in the Moment

Once you arrive at the wedding ceremony/reception, make a conscious effort to be present in the moment. Be part of the programme. Sing, pray, dance ….. enjoy the event. Resist the urge to browse the internet during the ceremony. Don’t distract others by chit chatting with a friend during the sermon.

At the reception, try to enjoy yourself too. Some people can be so distant that you wonder if they were dragged there. Have fun. Loosen up - applaud the bridal party as they enter, listen to the speeches, dance. I guarantee you that if you make an effort to be present in the moment, you will have a good time.

Photo credit: http://delsolphotography.com/farnaz-korosh-riviera-maya-wedding-fairmont-mayakoba/

5.     Send a Gift

Give the couple a meaningful gift as they start a new phase of their lives. If they have indicated a gift preference on the invitation (e.g. cash only or gift registry) respect those preferences. Sadly, these days, the gift table at weddings is usually empty. Guests show up empty-handed and expect to have a good time. Bear in mind that the couple has spent a lot of money so you can share their special day with them, so return the favour and go along with a gift.

Photo credit: http://yhorowitz.com/category/fashion/

60th Birthday Party at an Orphanage

My Pastor, Rev. Daniel Amoako Nyarko, turned 60 last Friday, July 18, 2015. He decided to celebrate his birthday with the children of the Safe Haven Foster home at Adenta in Accra. So as a gift to make his 60^th birthday memorable, we took over the event planning, design and coordination for the day.

With the horror stories of how children are treated in orphanages, I was skeptical about the motives of the people at the orphanage. But when we visited the home unannounced, I was highly impressed with the neatness of the place. The home was established by a Ghanaian couple, based in Switzerland. They have built a beautiful home for the 15 orphans. The children are in the care of Uncle Sam and his wife, as well as two other women, who also live at the home with the children. The children attend a good school in the neighbourhood, and they speak very good English.

The children thoroughly enjoyed the birthday party. They wore their party clothes and were truly ready to party. The joy on their faces as they enjoyed the food, drinks and good music was incredible.

I was touched by this trip to the orphanage because recently I’ve been complaining about the harsh economic conditions in Ghana and not having enough money to cater for all my ‘needs’. But this visit was a wake-up call to look beyond my own needs.

The founder of the orphanage could be making a lot of money by renting the house, yet he chose to make it a home for the orphans. The joy on the children’s faces showed that I don’t need much to be happy.

I was particularly touched by a three-year old boy called Kwame. I had a soft spot for him because he’s about the same age as my son Nana Yaw. I was sad that he didn’t have his biological parents taking care of him. However, thanks to the management of Safe Have Foster Home, he now had a family.

I’m sharing this post to inspire you to think of the less-privileged in the society. Don’t wait until you have met all your needs before you give to others. Remember that it is more blessed to give than to receive. So the next time you’re organizing a party, consider extending the celebration to the children in an orphanage.

            

                                                  Little Kwame Dancing 

Five Most Memorable Elements of a Wedding

Many elements come together to make a wedding unforgettable. Today, I have put together a list of the five most memorable elements of a wedding. Weddings cost a lot of money, so while you’re at it, you might as well make it unforgettable. Go big or go home!

1.     The Invitation

The wedding invitation sets the tone for the wedding. Personally, I decide whether or not to attend a wedding based on the invitation. For those weddings that I simply cannot get out of, the invitation helps me decide whether to wear that gorgeous dress I have been saving for an extra special occasion, or to wear that sundress that I have already worn to five other events.

Photo credit: Team 1000 Words Photography

2.     The Venue

The venue of the wedding ceremony and reception also make a lasting impact on your guests. We all remember that wedding we missed because we drove around in circles for hours trying to find the venue. For the convenience of your guests and vendors give clear directions to the venue. Other factors to consider about the venue are the cleanliness of the washrooms, availability of parking space and handicap accessibility.

                                                                                        Photo credit: Team 1000 Words Photography

3.     The Ambience

Ambience is the total look and feel of a space- the set up/décor, the lighting, the temperature, etc. All these work together to make guests feel comfortable. These days, a lot of couples are opting for outdoor wedding ceremonies. However, accurate timing of the event is very important to provide the perfect ambience. As a rule of thumb, outdoor events should start after 3:00 pm when the scorching heat from the sun is subsiding. For indoor events, ensure that the room temperature is just right – not too hot and not too cold.

                                                                                            Photo credit: Team 1000 Words Photography

4.     Food and Beverage Service

Now that your guests are comfortably seated, it’s time to impress them with the food and beverage service. Everyone loves a good party where food and drinks flow freely. Since food and drinks also form a huge chunk of the wedding budget, work with a guest list that you can comfortably cater for. Never compromise on the quality of your food and beverage service. The waiting staff is in direct contact with your guests, so use a professional company with well-trained staff. Also, use a registered catering company that complies with health and safety regulations. Have enough buffet stations so that guests do not have to wait for hours before getting their food.

                                                                                             Photo credit: Team 1000 Words Photography

5.     Entertainment

Many couples complain that guests leave right after eating. Well, what else is there to do after eating? To keep your guests partying late into the night, you need to entertain them. Speeches should be interesting and straight to the point. No monologues allowed! Get a good DJ and a good live band. Make sure that you play different genres of music so that both the old school and new school folks are entertained. The MC is well, the Master of the Ceremony and s/he sets the tone for the event, so go all out and get a great MC! You’ve already spent so much money and time on your wedding, so you might as well go the extra mile to make sure that you and all your guests have a great time.

                                                                                               Photo credit: Team 1000 Words Photography